Robert Goerman
Edited by Brian Dunning
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Paranormal investigator Robert Goerman has worked both sides
of the camera on History's Mysteries and Incredible
But True, and has been seen on Unsolved Mysteries and The
Unexplained on the Lifetime and A&E television networks.
Robert is perhaps best known for his debunking of the "Philadelphia
Experiment" hoax, which convinced much of the world
that the US Navy was making entire ships disappear and teleport.
He has also written a critically praised suspense novel, Himmler's
War.
Here and now, Robert answers our 1000 Questions:
0001. In all of history, what is your favorite invention?
Final Answer: Language and the written word.
0010. What do you hope will be invented next?
Final Answer: A global and fool-proof electronic mind-reading
energy field that would lay bare every man's deepest, darkest
thoughts and secrets for all to see and thus tremendously
reduce, if not eliminate, the evil now running rampant
everywhere upon our world.
0011. What do you hope will never be invented?
Final Answer: A global and fool-proof electronic mind-reading
energy field that would lay bare every man's deepest, darkest
thoughts and secrets for all to see. You think I'm crazy?
0100. What popular invention do you consider the most
ridiculous?
Final Answer: Veg-O-Matic
0101. When have you suffered at the hands of technology?
Final Answer: Television! I rest my case.
0110. When has some technology suffered at your hands?
Final Answer: As a teen, I constructed an "artificial
lightning" machine and played havoc upon our neighbors'
television reception. Then there are all those times when
I set out to repair some simple technological device. I
am the sole reason humanity invented the throwaway electronics
industry of today!
0111. If your personal computer suddenly came to life,
what would it say to you?
Final Answer: "Good afternoon, Robert. I am a HAL
9000 computer. The 9000 series is the most reliable computer
ever made. No 9000 computer has ever made a mistake or
distorted information. We are all, by any practical definition
of the words, foolproof and incapable of error. I know
that you and Frank were planning to disconnect me, and
I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen."
1000. If you found yourself sitting at a Unix terminal
as Earth's last hope while, outside, aliens were wiping
out humanity, what would you type?
Final Answer: "If you like Pina Coladas, and getting
caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the
cape.
I'm the earthling you've looked for, write to me, and escape."
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